Traveler's complaint

There are times when we all have complaints about other areas of the country or of the customs in each area. I am a huge proponent of following up with a local about these issues, however, if you ask a southerner, you should expect a blunt response. When you write me with a complaint, you’ll receive a friendly shot back across the bow.
A friend of mine recently wrote to tell me of the woes he experienced while driving to Disney World from Louisville, KY. I’d like to share that note with you…

I know you’re a native of the great state of GA, but I have to say, after driving through that state last week (on my way to Disney World), it was by far the most horrible driving experience I’ve dealt with. I can name 10 different problems with the highways in the state of GA, but I’m only going to identify the top 2:

2. Delay in cleaning up 7-car pileup, including a FedEx truck (go figure), caused me to wait over 5 hours in traffic, and miss the first half of the University of Louisville Final Four basketball game. I finally moved enough (using the emergency lane, although a truck tried to run me off of the road) to get off on a ramp in Vienna, GA. We stayed the night in a five star hotel (please detect sarcasm), whose primary income comes from the sale of Pecans.

1. State’s decision to work on greater than 150 miles of road construction on I-75 (the most traveled roadway to FL) during Spring Break for many different states, causing major delays in Valdosta (I also stayed the night there due to construction on the way back from Disney), cities just south of Atlanta, and cities just north of Atlanta (i.e. Canton).

Per my Maps On Us map and my TripTek, the trip should have taken a shade over 13 hours. However, due to the traffic issues in GA (I went through FL, TN and KY and no other state had these problems), the total amount of time each way was closer to 18 hours. Obviously, I’ve learned my lesson and I will never drive that distance again, and if I must, I will avoid GA at all costs. Do me a favor and vote for the other person in GA if there are any elections this year.

Thanks. I hope to hear from you soon.

Well, of course I responded in support of my state and with some common sense…

How's it going? - from your note, that may not be the question to ask. As with any state, there are many secrets only the natives know about Georgia and none of us are allowed to divulge them all without being extradited to some crazy-ass state like Kentucky. So, here's what I CAN tell you....

1) The 5-hour FedEx delay was actually a clever advertising ploy by DHL trying to demonstrate to a captive audience that "when it absolutely, positively has to get there," FedEx is not the optimal choice.
2) In most states, that 5 hours would have seemed MUCH longer (Kansas and Arkansas being two great examples).
3) Emergency lanes should only be used in case of emergency - no one in his/her right mind decides that Vienna (pronounced VI-enna) is a proper place to rest your head without owning a farm there - hence the "nuts" signs undoubtedly surrounding the motel. And,
4) the trucker was trying to warn you.

As for the construction, consider these points:

Millions of teens, college-aged kids and young parents travel that stretch of highway every spring - a rite of passage of sorts. However, Georgia businesses gain minimal exposure and revenue from these treks when they are too smooth. Florida, on the other hand, gets millions upon millions of dollars based solely on the fact that they have salt water on three sides. I ask you, how is it fair that we endure the crowds, the additional traffic and the crabby attitudes of cooped up travelers and they get all the payback? It's not. I give you Georgia's response for revenue sharing.

Ya'll come back now, ya'hear?